We had our first official doctors appointment yesterday. I was convinced I was going to walk in there and not leave until I saw the baby again, or hear a heart beat....I was going to put my foot down because of my anxiety. Well....that didn't happen, because I found a doctor that put me at such ease I actually trust HER. (I never like female OB's)

She answered all my questions with answers that went above and beyond. By the time I got to the exam she had insured me that our little baby is just fine inside me, since there are no signs otherwise. She said if baby is not okay, we will know....otherwise....just relax and enjoy.

I knew she was correct because when I was pregnant with Xavier (before I ever had a miscarriage) I did not see or worry about him until 12 weeks. That is when we first had a sonogram and screening, so I didn't know if he had a heart beat or anything until then....which is normal. The miscarriage is what really messes with women, because we are so scared it is going to happen again. So I am taking her relaxing and just enjoying. I mean, why should I stress and not enjoy this time...especially when I really think this is going to be be our last baby.

On another note, I came home and my sickness started to pick up. I am not complaining, it actually insures me everything is going okay. I promised myself that if we had a third baby I would enjoy every last second of it, even if I was throwing up sick like I was with my two boys. So far this pregnancy is completely different....so I cannot complain....and won't.

Next appointment.... March 1st. <3

Xavier and I were watching TV the other night....a commercial came on about adopting an Elephant to help save their trunks....and this conversation happened:

Xavier: "Mom....why would anyone want to adopt an Elephant?"

Me: "So that they do not become extinct and they will still be alive for when you have kids, so they can enjoy them."

Xavier: "But mom, they are so big...where do people put them?"

Me: *Blank Stare*

Xavier: "What, mom, what?"

Me: "Oh, you are being serious?"

Xavier: "They are huge, wouldn't that take up the whole back yard?"

Me: "Xavier, you really do not get the elephant.....you just adopt it sorta speak and send money to help them."

Xavier: "Oh, well that makes more sense, why don't they say that?"

........he is totally is my child......

Yesterday was a big milestone for "Baby Sprinkle." I got in to have an early sonogram since I am a high risk pregnancy, due to my blood clots and previous miscarriage before having Zayden. I was nervous because when I found out our little baby stopped growing before Zayden it was around the same exact time in January and also I was around the same time pregnant. According to my last period I should be around 6 1/2 weeks pregnant. I laid down and had to have an internal since we are so early. We saw the sac right away.....and I just had a feeling that was all we were going to see and I was going to get the news of a miscarriage was on it's way. The sonogram lady moved the internal device one way and was like "omg....look at that.....it is a heart beat!" I am only measuring 5 weeks and 5 days (yesterday) and there is already a heart beat. I was a week ahead, but either the baby is just small or I ovulated a week later then I thought. I am so thankful there is a heartbeat. If I wouldn't of seen a heartbeat and measured behind I would of left there yesterday an emotional disaster....but that little heartbeat just proves that there is this tiny 2mm little human growing inside me. (the size of a sprinkle) 

I know a lot of mama's out there have had miscarriages, so they can relate how hard these first few weeks are. I do not know how some mama's do it that do not get an early sonogram and just have to wait and see how things are going. I personally feel everyone should be able to get one around 8 weeks.

My next appointment is in the beginning of February.....it will be the first time to meet with my new doctors, so I cannot wait to see how that goes. As of right now I really like my new choice in offices.

Until next time!

Everyone has Powerball Fever, I mean 1.5 BILLION dollars just, omg sounds amazing. Not just amazing, like AMAZING! What would you do with the money? Here is a list of what this chick would do.

  • By land and build let a few very close relatives and friends build their dream (modest) homes on it.
  • Have those people pick a vacation spot and send them for a 2 week stay there. (I do not vacation with anyone but my little family....Andrew and the boys)
  • Pick out 2 nice cars......and one would be a family van. 
  • Open a cat sanctuary and work on cutting down the feral cat population throughout the United States.
  • INVEST WISELY and just live stress free with my closest family and friends. 
Do you have any dreams? What are they? What would you do? Post....we still have 2 and a half hours to dream and plan! 
For the past two weeks you have been the love of my life, you have always been there for me in my time of need, and most of all you have been in my dreams all hours of the night.

I have loved being able to use you as my comfort. When I was in need of something to make me happy and make my tummy happy too, you have been there for me..... Mcdonald's Canadian Bacon Egg McMuffin, it was love....!

I went to the doctors today and stepped on the scale, I have only known this precious cargo has been growing inside me for  a little while, but that little while I have ate so many of you when I stepped on the scale reality hit me in the face, which means....this 2 week love affair must now come to an end.

Just a few months ago I was around 125lbs, but unless my doctors scale is off I am up to 150lbs! Yes, you read that correctly.

I know it has only been 2 weeks, I know my cravings are so strong....but we must be strong together, we must part ways.....I must let you go. I will mourn the big Golden Arches as a drive past you, calling my name "Nikki....baby.....come get me."I will fight the urge of pulling into the easy to use drive through to grab one two of you for my craving gain. We must be strong together, I must stay healthy for this little punk growing inside me.....I must fight on.

Dearest Egg McMuffin...I will miss you.....but until we meet again....you will only be in my dreams.....

my very first coloring.
For Christmas all I wanted was adult coloring books (doesn't that sound so dirty) and Sharpie markers. When I opened up one of my gifts from Andrew Santa I couldn't of been more excited, I got colored pencils and coloring books! When I got to my mom and dads, they got me a kit of 32 Sharpies and more coloring books. I never thought at 32 years old I would be so excited to receive
coloring books as gifts, but I just cannot get enough of this craze!

With my Anxiety these coloring books do the trick for me, and if you know me, you know I have really bad Anxiety attacks, to the point they disrupt my life. I have been the coloring queen since Christmas and I love hitting up all the hobby stores to see what kind of coloring books they have. My kids know not to touch my coloring stuff....how bad is that? I could honestly sit for hours, on my couch, in my own little world, just me and my coloring! 

My Victorian Beauty! 
I went to Michael's Craft Store the other day and found this Victorian coloring book, where you color the dresses, hair, and makeup of the ladies. I sat when I got home and it took me 2 days but I finished and I love it. Please tell me I am not alone in this new found obsession? I have also learned from Adult Coloring Groups on Facebook (yes I am serious) that you can get the coloring books cheaper on Amazon. I have a shopping cart full of books just waiting for me to hit "order." 

Please tell me I am not the only one in this obsession? Please tell me I am not the only one that sits on her computer looking for coloring books I want to order? Please tell me I am not the only one that obsesses over what color pattern/color combinations I am going to use. Please tell me I am not the only one that drives from store to store to see if there are any interesting coloring books that I must have. 

.....okay......"Hi, my name is Nikki Craddock and I am a coloring addict."


Little Z is being promoted. 

HAPPY 2016! It has been forever since I have blogged but anxiety and life had taken over. I am back, and better then ever....and PREGNANT!

Today is Zayden's 3rd Birthday, so what better way to celebrate then give him a big brother shirt in front of my mom and dad? (Xavier was there too...but was in on the surprise, we told him last night) Can you believe my mom didn't get it? She actually thought that I was announcing to her that I was going to be on the reality TV show "Big Brother." (Ya'll know that is my dream to be on there)

It went well, both sets of grandparents are thrilled....they are secretly hoping for a girl, but we all know that I am going to have "my 3 sons." Not that is a bad thing, it would be really good because I have everything for the baby except diapers. LOL. I literally saved every article of boy clothing from Zayden because I was hoping for a 3rd child one day. 

This will be our last child. I am almost 6 weeks, so I haven't even heard a heart beat yet, but I am showing. Yes, it is prob a little bloat too but I seriously am poking out since I am so small. It is hilarious, I swear after I eat I look about 3 months pregnant. As of right now I have NO morning sickness, I am eating everything, but craving Mcdonalds Canadian Bacon Egg McMuffins? I can eat them morning, noon, and night....and in between. I just cannot believe I do not have any morning sickness yet, because if you know me, you know I get deathly sick from conception until 20 weeks. I thnk that is making me nervous too....but I can deal, I love to eat and now I have an excuse. Who cares if I gain weight....this is my last baby....I am enjoying this......enjoying every moment! 

Eek. I just can't get over this. I am so excited that I cannot even type. I wanna jump up and down, but my boobs hurt too much! HA!

Baby Craddock #3.....coming September 2016
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